the Orpheus story
Orpheus was the son of Morpheus (God of Sleep) and Calliope, the muse of epic poetry, was the nephew of Death, Destiny, Destruction, Desire, the Despair, Delirium and probably the first cousin of all the tarot and horoscope together.
Well, we are going to marry Orpheus with Eurydice, a very rich brunette, cute, dancing and above good pal had kaleta of friends rich.
Orpheus, who had traveled with Chuck Norris and Macgiver, had half a loaf of friends, all fucking vultures, which pa pressured to submit to the friends of Eurydice, but always I forgot, and was very camel q pa music, and only engaged in writing and go to auditions of American Idol, Mekano and those weas.
was held the wedding party and friends were so hot by Eurydice friendly one, a satyr (half man, half ram), could not stand and the excuse to talk a little word Eurydice away from the group and tried to run hand.
Eurydice started the caliph, CAEU so bad that he stepped on a snake, which bit her causing serious injury resulting in death (ie, died), according to the police report at the time.
Orfeo to learn of the death of his mine, he left his aunt "Death", asking him to send to Hades to retrieve Eurydice.
Death said, "look che, I can not send Acha, but I can make you immortal CHO, which can descend to Hades without being retained longer in those parts.
After her aunt "made immortal 3 times," Orfeo then departed on foot to the world of the dead, that could be reached by entering the house of Carlitox
Arriving at the house this will Carlitox said: "Hello, come to float ... Look, I have a potala interdimensional, look ... I never used it .... good bye ...
thus continued to fall until it reached a pond, where there was, aboard a small boat, a completely senile old man, who said:
"Hello viteh I so as I'm going to take a viteh, poker, I have viteh cold cold cold ... nah this is not a joke, as well as that here in the infiernoo loans ... and I viteh cold cold (silence) ... I have viteh vest !!!!"
say that the Greeks put their dead a copper coin in the mouth, so that the spirit of the old pay him over the lagoon.
That is because at the time the ticket was very cheap, but then rose with higher oil prices and in between the old strike was launched and he seized the boat, but that's another story.
Orfeo paid the old man with a cherry blossom branch that he bought yolanda sultana ... and it is impossible to know if perhaps that was the default payment or if you just took that in his senility has confused the old twig with a bud.
The thing is took him across the lake and Orpheus went on.
Orfeo Shortly later met the creature that guarded the underworld, nothing less than the Cerberus, a three-headed dog with lion's legs, back of a bull, zebra crossing and yield
step.
Unlike Hercules, Orpheus did not confronted him but he played his lyre and sang.
is not known whether the lira was truly magical and the song was very boring, but the dog was asleep and Orfeo crack went his way.
finally came to Hades, a large cave where they were pale as the dead souls, without talking, doing nothing really ... was like a great civil registry office but took no coffee here.
In the center of the cave were two huge thrones on which were seated mine Hades and Persephone. Orfeo greeted and explained that I had come for his bride Eurydice.
Luckily it was just noon and shot with 12 not heard the half lid that Hades made him ... and Orpheus sang.
and sang and sang and the song was not bad but it was more onion que la cresta (noviembre sin ti se quedaba chica al lado de esta wea), y todos lloraban... lloraba Hades, lloraba Perséfone, lloraban Tántalo, Sísifo y todos los que estaban siendo castigados.
Lloraban las furias y los muertos...
Puro llanto, y mientras Orfeo se secaba los mocos y trataba de seguir cantando, al lado de él estaba Sobalaprieta con un micrófono, y le decía: " Grande Orfeo, estoy llorando acá en el hades".
Tanto cantó y tanto lloraron que Hades le dijo: "ya weon, ganaste... llévate a tu mina pero lo we do as follows:
"Devuélvete now that other way is not the same way you came.
In fact this road is narrow and steep but there are no gaps or dogs, and going to go directly to the Caracol, a shop where a metalhead Satanic moron ... do these tattoos look! " So saying he showed him a tattoo of "a dragon" bastard.
Then followed: "Eurydice will go behind you, but will go as a ghost until you leave the snail, so you can not hear it or be able to communicate.
But beware: the only thing I ask you to stop outside the ditty, is that all the way do not look back, because if you look back you've lost Eurydice forever.
Orfeo thought that sounded so hairy, and began to walk. He thought that Hades was laughing behind his back, but kept walking ...
Orfeo up and up in the dark, giving the heading of the stalactites and stalagmites stumbling against (or was it vice versa?) In one of those fell on his face and his hand violently leaned against an object cold.
Curious, Orpheus took him in her hands and found it was a ring ... wait, that's another story ... continued to rise.
thought all the way ... "Eurydice is behind me ... I can not hear it because it is a ghost, or I can look at it because Hades
commanded me ... then it might not be behind me and I would be leaving to Olympian moron."
But just in case, and because it was a romantic, kept rising and rising.
I kept thinking that Hades had been laughing when he went ... Hades laughed why? Joke would have remembered the woman's hose?.
will have ticklish? or plain laughed at how naive was Orpheus? Impossible to know, but Orpheus rising.
Finally, the smell of leather, ink and marijuana wafted Orpheus told him that the output was near, and a faint glow at the end of the road is confirmed .
Being just steps from the exit of the cave, he was struck again the paranoia ... "I will been making the famous moron Hades? And, do not take it anymore, Orpheus turned.
What he saw at that time was basically floating Eurydice as 10 cm from the ground, pale and silent, but absolutely shocked expression. And the ghost gestured in despair, but vanished before he could approach her Orpheus.
Orfeo realized he had lost his only chance to regain Eurydice ... and went head down the walkway.
What happened next is unclear. Months passed when nobody knew what had happened to Orpheus.
Some said they had seen in the "Neruda", another that had been DJing at a party in the 3rd age. Others claimed that it had entered into a motel with Geisha.
The truth is that Orpheus gave the night and the spool, and that was, in Volon cocaine base, when his mother appeared, Calliope, and said, " Orpheus, are in grave danger. "
Next came Don Graf and said the same thing. Although startled to see a dog raincoat Orpheus sighed and told his mother: "Mom, let me, because nothing matters to me."
Calliope insisted: "Orfeo, in grave danger. The daughters of the frenzy, the Bacchae,
worshipers of Bacchus, come over here.
They knew that no open bar at The End 2 and raze everything in its path. " Did not fish and Calliope Orpheus surrendered and went along with Don Graf.
Soon came a crowd of scantily clad women and drunken singing and dancing "the flying cat" "Oh Andrea" and other cumbias. Mines were "mekago."
More Chico Perez came back and SQP, the Devilish Guagua, Ballero, the geisha, Pato Yañez , + lots more Advanced Member jet set news.
All Orpheus surrounded with cries of: "Whoever does not jump exploits, etc!" But Orpheus would not participate because he had pain and was with the pale of marijuana.
The Bacchae are overreacting because orfeo not caught, and threw themselves upon him, abused, her long nails scratching in their private parts, and finely shredded to bite.
All that remained was his head, which was thrown into the Rio Bio Bio with such bad luck that landed right in a piece of shit floating.
As her aunt's death had resigned to take him ever, the head was still alive, unable to die, and then agonized all weekend, until his father appeared, Morpheus, the lord of dream, which he said: "My son, you're lucky you've sought."
Orpheus begged him to kill him but sleep answered "Are you crazy? Know what they do, the Eumenides (female demons of justice and revenge) that kill your own blood?" Have not you read about Greek mythology?
"I'd read if I had body aweonao old, but I'm just a head! I can not even wipe my ass! I have not even ass! "
" Well, son, I have arranged these mines until you take care .... Chile leaves a world champion in soccer ... then see what it is ... "And so he left.
End? ¬ ¬
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